MATERIAL GIRL
MATERIAL GIRL
Bullying Works
New York Is A Good Place to Bullshit
It really is magical.
Manifesting, or Delusion?
The natural-born procrastinator in me can’t even multitask chewing and walking, let alone maintaining two separate realities on a daily basis.
The Ideal Way Into Show Business
In a fantasy world, my big break into comedy goes like this…
Girls Just Want to Have Fun
Having fun feels like something boys want you to earn, and girls just know they can have.
Colin Quinn and Psychic Readings
The beauty of New York City is paying two different people to elaborate on your deepest fears and desires in one night.
The Business of Dreams
As efficient as life is in Manhattan—nothing ever goes as planned.
Alright, So People Still Suck
It’s getting pretty bad to be mildly unbothered.
On Living In New York
Give Us Liberty, Or Honestly Anything at This Point
I think it’s perfectly justifiable to credit our bloodlines for negative things, too.
Parental Control
MTV had the 13-18 demographic in a chokehold during weekend programming in the mid-2000s.
Bots Are Actually Real AF
Consistency is key, even if it doesn’t exist.
It’s My Job To Keep Pop-punk, Home Phones, and Cable TV Alive
Music, broadcast media, and electronics such as awesome fusion rock bands, home phones, and cable access are means of survival for a drastic many.
What Striking Means for Us Losers
For those of us that suck at traditional approaches to things: This could be our time.
Bring Back Telling People They Suck at Things
Drop the pickle ball lessons and bulk up on lower-aptitude extracurriculars where social hour is the predominant purpose of existing.
Start Using the Internet for Stupid Shit Again
Find out what derogatory meaning your name has on Urban Dictionary, and live a little.
Comparison Isn’t the Thief of Joy, It’s People
Quotes like this are, in my easily unamused opinion, misleading.
Let Me Fansplain Taylor Swift’s New TV Show
It could be 13 seasons long. Or evermore.
Why You’re Bothered by NYC Vending Machines
If anything, the machines are multi-faceted recreational posts that encourage community efforts and inspire creativity.
I Can’t Find a Newspaper Anywhere
It’s not too late for paperboys to come back to the neighborhood.